Play is the way that young children learn.
There are 3 kinds of play that children need: playing with
parents, playing with other children, and independent play.
When your child plays independently, you don't have to be in
the room (depending on the child's age), but you should
check on your child.
Independent play helps children develop
self-esteem and confidence. They need their own private
space and time. Helping your child become more independent
helps them learn about feelings, dreams, and ideas.
Teaching your child to play independently
for longer and longer periods of time is a very slow
process. You can help by giving them choices and by
organizing play times and activities. The age of your child
determines what type of activities you use to teach this
skill. For toddlers, playing with a toy is a good activity.
For older, school-age children, reading or hobbies may be
best. Choose activities that your child likes.
- Determine how
long your child is now able to play by himself.
(For example, coloring, playing with toys, or reading).
It may be a very short time (1 to 5 minutes).
- Pick a time to
work on increasing your child's attention span each day.
Having a specific playtime each day makes the process
easier.
- Ask your child
to play quietly for a time. Choose an amount of
time you feel certain he can manage (maybe 5 minutes).
Set a portable kitchen timer for that amount of time.
- Give your
child brief love pats as often as possible during this
time. Reward him but don't distract him.
- Gradually
increase playtime. The amount of increase
depends on your child. At first set the timer for the
same amount of time for 3 or 4 days. If your child is
enjoying these quiet types of activities at any other
time during the day, be sure to give her lots of
physical contact during such times.
- If your child
has tantrums and refuses to play independently, place
him in time-out. After the time-out is over,
tell your child again to engage in the activity. Praise
getting started and trying.
- Model the kind
of behavior you expect your child to have. For
example, if you would like your child to read more, it's
very important that she see you enjoying reading.
