Parents often have problems getting their
children to follow instructions. Here are some ideas that
may help.
Giving
Instructions or Commands
- Make sure you have your child's
attention when you give a direction. Say the child's
name and ask that he look at you; for example, "Bob,
look at me".
- Give the child a simple, clear
command, such as "Please shut the door."
- Thank the child when he does what you
say.
Things to Remember
- Be realistic. Give your child
instructions that you know she is physically and
developmentally able to do.
- Be direct and specific. Say things
like "Joey, put your shoes in the closet" or "Open the
door." Avoid questions that imply choice when there
really is no choice, such as "Don't you want to go
downstairs?"
- Give one instruction at a time, and
give your child 10 seconds to begin to obey. Do not
repeat the same instruction a second time. Keep eye
contact with your child.
- Do not give a second instruction while
the child is working on the first one.
- Do not give your child an instruction
unless you are prepared to use time-out for not minding.
When Your Child Obeys
- When your child obeys, praise and
encourage him so that he will continue the desired
behavior.
- Thank the child for following the
direction by saying something like, "Thank you for
putting your bear in the toy box, Joey."
- Kids love hugs and pats, so be sure to
touch your child as well as praise his behavior.
If Your Child Refuses to Obey
- Put your child in time-out right away.
- Do not interact with your child when
she is in time-out.
- After time-out, require your child to
complete the requested task. This will give her a chance
to get attention when she obeys and will teach her that
you are serious when you give a command.