Many parents use grounding as a way to
discipline children. However, when parents ground children
for several weeks, it often loses its effectiveness.
Grounding puts restraints on the whole family, and in time,
parents may give in. When this happens, children learn their
parents won't follow through with the grounding they impose.
Job grounding involves brief and intense
grounding. Your child is given a chance to earn his or her
way off grounding by completing a job. This works best with
10 to16 year old children. Job grounding also helps your
child learn how to do various jobs around your home.
- Sit down with
your child and develop a list of at least 10 jobs to be
done around the house. Choose jobs that take at
least 1 or 2 hours to complete, and that your child is
able to do. Examples of such jobs are sweeping out the
garage, raking the front yard, and vacuuming the living
and dining rooms. Talk about job grounding at a pleasant
time, not when your child is about to be punished.
- Write each job
on a separate index card with a detailed description of
how to do the job correctly. For example: Wash
kitchen floor: Sweep the floor first. Remove all movable
pieces of furniture. Fill a bucket with warm soapy
water. Wash the floor with a clean rag, squeezed so that
it is not dripping. Replace the furniture that was
moved.
- Explain to
your child that when she has broken a rule (for
example, fighting with a brother or not coming home from
school on time), one or more job
cards will be assigned. The child will randomly
select the assigned number of cards from the prewritten
job cards. Until the assigned job described on the card
is done correctly, the child will be grounded.
- Being grounded
means:
- going to school
- performing required chores
- following house rules
- staying in own room unless eating
meals, working on chores or homework, or attending
school
- no television
- no telephone calls
- no record player, radio, etc.
- no video games or other games or
toys
- no bike riding
- no friends over or going to
friends' houses
- no snacks
- no outside social activities (for
example, movies or going out to dinner).
- Grounding does
NOT mean:
- nagging
- reminding about jobs to be done
- discussing the grounding
- explaining the rules.
- When the jobs
are completed, make sure that they have been done
correctly. Praise your child for completing the
chores correctly. If a job is not done correctly, review
the job description and give feedback on what was done
correctly and incorrectly. Without nagging, have your
child redo the tasks that were done incorrectly in order
to end the grounding.
- Your child
determines how long he or she is to be grounded.
The grounding lasts only as long as it takes to complete
the assigned jobs. It could last several hours or
several days.
- If the
grounding seems to be lasting too long, make sure that
your child's life is dull during the grounding.
Do not allow snacks, video games, or other activities.
Make sure you are not giving them more attention when
they are grounded than you do when they behave well.
If you plan a family outing, get a baby sitter to stay with
your child. The grounded child stays at home.